Living Into the Answers

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  • 1983

    1983

    1983 was magical and scary in the way that some things can be both at once. Mom and I had moved from the small house in Garland to the big, three-story, five bedroom in Colleyville, and I’d gone from only child to the youngest of four in the matter of a weekend. My new step-dad…

    fairamey

    February 9, 2024
    Uncategorized
  • The Keeping

    The Keeping

    The first bleed came one night in March, seven days after the quiet ultrasound that revealed what my bones already knew; the usual secret lifeforce of early pregnancy had felt muted this time around, I could not feel the soul inside me as I had in my previous pregnancies. Thirteen weeks of morning sickness and…

    fairamey

    December 30, 2023
    Uncategorized
    cancer, child-loss, grief, motherhood, womanhood
  • Meerjungfrau

    Bright sparkle crush orange citrus baby sunbeam beach shell Wave crasher sand bucket love beat tide jumper and fresh face splash mouth saltwater love open eyes heart ray sunshine starfish tangle stretching into sunbeams a new morning Boat motor hum, seagull songs, salt scented air, double crested Cormorant, cocooned crabs, an ecosystem of peace, tides…

    fairamey

    July 4, 2023
    Uncategorized
    ascension, bravery, grief, healing, ocean, phoenix rising, rise, trial
  • Missing

    Missing

    I was five the day the police came looking for me. I could hear the whir of helicopter blades in the air outside and noticed a small crowd had gathered in the street in front of my apartment complex. My friend Jennifer and I peeked out gingerly from behind the curtains to see what all…

    fairamey

    June 12, 2023
    Uncategorized
  • She Peeks Out

    She Peeks Out

    Sometimes you spend ten years hiding. No one ever tells you this when you’re young. The adults are busy carrying out lives and reenacting age-old patterns and sometimes hiding themselves. Or they’re doing the heavy lifting of confronting who they never became and who they are becoming. You don’t  yet know, age 9, hair tangling…

    fairamey

    February 28, 2023
    Uncategorized
    Bereaved Mom, inner child, Rilke
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